"Today I got in touch with the earth...well a puddle of mud and gravel to be precise...and I didn't just touch it, I was forced through it as Danny lunged forward full force because he wanted to meet...or something...the neighbor dog who was at least 50 yards away. I now know first hand, second hand, right side from shoulder to shoe how to fly through a puddle. This is something I never really wanted to learn. I think Danny was rather surprised by his strength, stopped barking and sort of looked at muddy, horizontal me with look that said "OOOoops sorry!" This was quickly followed by, "Wow, cool, I am soooo strong!" and then, "Oh darn, I bet our walk is now over". And it was! However the aches and scratches will last awhile longer."
Regards,
The WebMouse's dog walking daughter
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Vile Accusation
I have a dog.
My dog had my billfold in his mouth.
I didn't give it to him.
That does NOT make him a pickpocket.
I am (almost) sure that it fell out of my pocket while I was sitting in my chair. Such things do happen.
He's not, after all, like that "Baked Beans commercial" dog that is always trying to sell the secret family recipe for his owners (Bush's Baked Beans) beans. That dog is an opportunist and not trustworthy.
The fact that my billfold is made of leather, which he sort of likes to chew on, and doubtless smells of me, whom he loves dearly, should not enter the picture.
He wasn't, after all, eating the billfold and had not touched the credit cards. He was "closely examining" a couple receipts I had stuffed in the wallet. Doubtlessly looking for errors that he might bring to my attention. He looks out for me.
I recovered most of the receipt he was tasting and it was of no importance. The billfold had no major tooth marks that I could see, and the slight marks it did get just lend it more of an "experienced" look.
He was happy to trade back the wallet for a dog treat, although I'm sure he would have returned it anyway... probably... eventually... I think.
Given the low probability of him being able to slip my wallet out of my pocket with teeth and paws I'm mostly sure he didn't do it and it was all my fault. I mean... It's just not very believable. Pretty much, anyway.
Did I mention he loves me?
I have a dog.
I have a billfold with tooth marks.
Circumstantial, at best.
Regards,
WebMouse
My dog had my billfold in his mouth.
I didn't give it to him.
That does NOT make him a pickpocket.
I am (almost) sure that it fell out of my pocket while I was sitting in my chair. Such things do happen.
He's not, after all, like that "Baked Beans commercial" dog that is always trying to sell the secret family recipe for his owners (Bush's Baked Beans) beans. That dog is an opportunist and not trustworthy.
The fact that my billfold is made of leather, which he sort of likes to chew on, and doubtless smells of me, whom he loves dearly, should not enter the picture.
He wasn't, after all, eating the billfold and had not touched the credit cards. He was "closely examining" a couple receipts I had stuffed in the wallet. Doubtlessly looking for errors that he might bring to my attention. He looks out for me.
I recovered most of the receipt he was tasting and it was of no importance. The billfold had no major tooth marks that I could see, and the slight marks it did get just lend it more of an "experienced" look.
He was happy to trade back the wallet for a dog treat, although I'm sure he would have returned it anyway... probably... eventually... I think.
Given the low probability of him being able to slip my wallet out of my pocket with teeth and paws I'm mostly sure he didn't do it and it was all my fault. I mean... It's just not very believable. Pretty much, anyway.
Did I mention he loves me?
I have a dog.
I have a billfold with tooth marks.
Circumstantial, at best.
Regards,
WebMouse
Thursday, January 8, 2009
A lesson and an issue
I am a good looking, friendly, highly intelligent, sophisticated, inventive and generally all around wonderful person. Fully worthy of respect if not outright awe.
I have a dog.
God has a sense of humor. That is a very fortunate thing.
The dog makes sure I know that I am loved but the rest of that stuff is... well... what I shovel (he is a BIG dog) up in the back yard every day.
A dog will love you pretty much no matter how big of a jerk you are. He may laugh his furry ass off at your attempts to impress him but in the end he will come and lick your face and lay on your feet. Love is a clean (from a dog's viewpoint) face and warm feet. I don't know that I can really disagree. A warm dog does a lot to ease lots of things. You just sit there and pet the dog and your mind zones out and the problems just aren't there. Warm feet or warm lap... it's all good.
Supposedly, according to the dog training lady, if a dog licks your chin that is a mark of respect.
I have a dog.
I have a beard.
Crumbs happen.
Personally, I think the dog is just looking for a treat. Ok with me.
The issue... ah yes... did you ever note that dogs don't have nose hairs. Men get them. Not enough to wax out into a miniature handlebar nose-stash, just enough to be ugly. We also very often lose hair at the same time on the top of our head.
Now... what genetic decision was made that said dogs get to keep a full head of hair and don't have nose hair but men do?
This should be looked into when genetic sequencing get's easy to do. I mean... really... what is the point? We won't even go into the ear hair thing.
There are at least a couple genes in the human genome that could stand some "adjustment".
Actually, speaking from my business travel days, there is an entire pool of genes, generally located below the Mason-Dixon line that really could use some "adjustment". Here I'm thinking a "Darwin Award" level of adjustment.
I keep hearing that God doesn't make mistakes... however... I definitely plan to ask about the nose hair issue. I mean, really... what was the idea there?
I am a more humble person than before, just not due to any lengthy introspection or intelligent self assessment.
I have a dog.
My dog loves me. I'm doing just fine with his opinion, thank you very much.
Regards,
WebMouse
I have a dog.
God has a sense of humor. That is a very fortunate thing.
The dog makes sure I know that I am loved but the rest of that stuff is... well... what I shovel (he is a BIG dog) up in the back yard every day.
A dog will love you pretty much no matter how big of a jerk you are. He may laugh his furry ass off at your attempts to impress him but in the end he will come and lick your face and lay on your feet. Love is a clean (from a dog's viewpoint) face and warm feet. I don't know that I can really disagree. A warm dog does a lot to ease lots of things. You just sit there and pet the dog and your mind zones out and the problems just aren't there. Warm feet or warm lap... it's all good.
Supposedly, according to the dog training lady, if a dog licks your chin that is a mark of respect.
I have a dog.
I have a beard.
Crumbs happen.
Personally, I think the dog is just looking for a treat. Ok with me.
The issue... ah yes... did you ever note that dogs don't have nose hairs. Men get them. Not enough to wax out into a miniature handlebar nose-stash, just enough to be ugly. We also very often lose hair at the same time on the top of our head.
Now... what genetic decision was made that said dogs get to keep a full head of hair and don't have nose hair but men do?
This should be looked into when genetic sequencing get's easy to do. I mean... really... what is the point? We won't even go into the ear hair thing.
There are at least a couple genes in the human genome that could stand some "adjustment".
Actually, speaking from my business travel days, there is an entire pool of genes, generally located below the Mason-Dixon line that really could use some "adjustment". Here I'm thinking a "Darwin Award" level of adjustment.
I keep hearing that God doesn't make mistakes... however... I definitely plan to ask about the nose hair issue. I mean, really... what was the idea there?
I am a more humble person than before, just not due to any lengthy introspection or intelligent self assessment.
I have a dog.
My dog loves me. I'm doing just fine with his opinion, thank you very much.
Regards,
WebMouse
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