Bath time!

I have a dog.

Dogs have certain habits.

I had informed my wife about some of the more unpleasant ones.

I had told her about my friend's dog that rolled in Bear shit (was living in Alaska at the time). You TRULY do not want to have to deal with something like that. The dog evidently thought the scent was attractive.

I forgot this.

I found my dog in his backyard dog run with his back covered in what appeared to be white paint. Wet white paint and sort of thick.

He had found a plastic bag of kitty litter "scoopings" that had evidently laid by the back step for months and got hidden in the grass. It never made it to it's intended destination. (mea culpa - on both tall grass and forgotten bag)

Keen hunter that he is, he found it and dragged the bag to the center of the lawn and proceeded to roll on it and generally have fun. The bag, by this time, had holes in it and the seriously wet mass of clay kitty litter was little more than a bag of mildly scented very wet white clay.

1. Moved said bag (carefully!) out of the way to be properly disposed of.
2. Chased down dog.
3. Got garden hose.
4. Washed down dog.
5. Dog "dried" himself.
6. Went for walk with dog.

It's that step #5 that did it. Dogs shake violently to fling off the water. It works fairly well. Long haired dogs can get their hair whipping back and forth at a pretty good clip. This is called a "shower".

Since I was really wet and shaking did not seem to work for me, Danny and I went for a walk to dry off a little. That sort of worked.

When we got back I took a towel to him and dried him some more. Operating on the theory of "in for a penny in for a pound" (dumb British saying!) my wife and I decided to give him a "real" bath. With real dog shampoo and warm water this time. (mumble, mumble)

He got cleaner and really seemed to enjoy the whole process as the warm water was probably much nicer than the garden hose of cold water I used. I say "my wife and I" in the very loosest term. She pretty much watched and laughed.

It was the same process as before without the walk. It was steps #4 and #5 all over. Literally. Dog is now clean(er) and seemed pretty happy about all the toweling. He really likes that.

I took a real shower and changed out of now seriously wet clothing. My wife now had the good sense to stop laughing.

On the positive, but only slightly, side... it wasn't paint.

Which brings up my next dilemma, we live in the woods, bears also live in these woods, bears do what bears do in the woods. I am quite sure that at some time in the future my laughter at my friends "dog/bear problem" will come home to add to the humor of life.

Life being that thing that bites you in the butt when you are turned laughing at some other poor soul.

A dog, on the other hand, is what is standing there innocently, watching the whole process. He also forgives you for both not picking up the back of used litter when you should have and also for taking it away from him when he was enjoying it. You are, after all, only human and have no comprehension of the subtle humor of life.

I have a dog.

And... humor in my life.

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